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  • Wednesday 9.14.2022

    I miss you.

    I miss you, and you’re with me every day. How is that possible? When I spend valuable time with you, I miss you the second a moment between us has passed. The minute our laughter has died down. In the silence when you’re done speaking to me. I miss you.

    I drop you off at school each morning, and as the teachers urge me to drive along, I watch you walk thru the doors. I glance at my clock to catch if I’m running behind for work. As I make the turn to officially leave, I try to sneak one last glance at your backpack, but most of the time, you’re already gone. I miss you.

    Your costume for Halloween recently arrived. You put on a show for daddy and me in the bedroom, complete with the mask that came with it. Part of your performance was standing in front of our full-length mirror hissing and growling with a menacing posture. Claws out; Watch out! Superhero? No way! Villainous and creepy was what you wanted this year. It’s so fun to see you roleplay different characters, and no matter how scary you play, you’re sure to remind me villains are bad guys and superheroes are the good guys. I miss you.

    This morning you played a guessing game with me on our route to school. You got out each Marvel and DC Comic metal figurine you had waiting in the car to inspect. You were so excited to call out the figure’s colors for me to guess the character. When it became too difficult, you would help by adding the superpower. I miss you.

    I will see you when I come home tonight and you will tell me all about your day. I will be listening and I will miss you.

    With all my love,

    Mama

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  • Hello!

    I’m not sure who I’m specifically writing to.. my son or myself.

    What has prompted me to begin a blog of my thoughts? Truthfully, those that cross my mind daily focused solely on my baby. I hope one day he will read these and have some insight into who his mom is or was.

  • Thursday 9.8.22

    Consider this a mama’s diary. I haven’t had a diary since I was a little girl, and even then, I wasn’t very good at keeping up with it. I was more preoccupied with a book in my spare time. Better at listening than speaking. I can understand the pull of putting your voice on the eternal paper, and currently, I struggle with doing so as I’ve yet to consider myself a well-written person. Your father, on the other hand, is a wonderful writer, as is your family on his side.

    BUT…

    I do this for you, my sweet boy, as I’ve dedicated all aspects of my life for the last 7 years to you. When I drive to work in the morning, when I go about my day, and when I lay down to sleep, you’re always on my mind.

    Boston Baby

    Remember when we would walk to the library in Natick, Massachusetts? You likely don’t since you were only a few months old. I would take you for walks near our apartment in your stroller. Just you and I.

    When we would arrive at the library, I would carry you down to the basement where the children’s room was, and you would crawl and explore to your heart’s desire. I would try so hard to imagine what your personality was going to be, what your voice was going to sound like, and what features would be distinctly yours.

    After our library trips, most days, we would walk to Dunkin Donuts but sometimes, on special days, I would scrounge up as much loose change as I could find and take you to the local ice cream shop.

    Ice Cream & Cafe, Natick MA

    I hope one day you get a chance to visit. This shop and those walks bring back many precious memories I have of your first year. It may sound simple, it may sound not very adventurous, though I assure you I cherished every second.

    With all my love,

    Mama

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